Michelle is constantly talking and out of her seat. She is always the last one to transition and I usually have to be very firm with her to make that happen.
Our biggest meltdown came with Shawn, just shortly before our Martin Luther King Jr. assembly. Here is part of the email I sent Mom because it is easier than retyping it with a couple of comments I added.
Well, we had our biggest meltdown. Shawn kept burping and I had asked him numerous times to stop or do it silently. Then he and another little guy were laughing. I told him to stop about 3 times and get his math done. Everyone else was working on their math and he was just sitting there eating his snack. So basically, after giving him so many reminders, I pulled 2 of his cards because he didn't seem to care after the numerous reminders that he was causing problems. There was my big mistake. I should have pulled one earlier and then pulled the second if he didn't stop. So... Bradley completely melted down. He was sobbing and then screaming. I just walked off and ignored it because he usually calms himself down when I ignore the behavior. He then got up and went in the corner. I told him it was time to come back and do his math. He started yelling about how he hates math. I told him he still had to come do it. He said he would just rip it up and I told him that he wouldn't and he needed to get it done. He continued to yell and be upset. He sat down back by his desk on the floor and cried. (He continued yelling and saying how he hated his parents because if he got a yellow card they would smash his DS. (I know they wouldn't do that, but you know how kids see things.)) We were getting ready to go to an assembly, so I called our discipline person from the learning center and he came and got him. I didn't feel like a serious assembly about Martin Luther King Jr. was a good place for him at the time. He went with him and finished his math. They then played some games and he was fine when he returned. (He also had snacks and got a computer reward, not quite the discipline I was hoping for, but he was in control when he returned.)
That is the first time he has had a meltdown like that all year, so I am not concerned, but just thought you should know. Mr ____, from the learning center, did say that Shawn immediately complained about the loud noise in Mr. ___ room (the furnace). He has never mentioned it in my room, so I thought he may just be on sensory overload and so that was just one more thing he couldn't handle.
I know he was really angry about getting the yellow card and was very upset because he is afraid he will lose his new DS.
Let me know if you have any questions or concerns. I don't expect, based on our past experiences, that this will happen often, but I certainly learned about how I could handle it better next time. He really is doing a great job and I am sorry that I have had to send so many emails lately. I just want to keep you updated and get your insight.
Thank you.
Mom's response was really insightful. His parents are so supportive and that makes a HUGE difference. They understand that I am trying and they give great advice.
I'm sorry that happened last Friday. It drives me up a wall when he gets that emotional and reactive at home, and I couldn't imagine what it's like dealing with that behavior while taking care of 25 wiggly first-graders.
When I saw this email Friday evening, ____ and I talked with Shawn about the situation and thankfully found Shawn able to articulate clearly and (mostly) honestly describe what happened. He was still upset and anxious, so we walked him through letting go of his stress.
At Shawns's OT today I asked the therapist for more ideas of what to do if and when this starts happening again.
When he is losing control like this, try giving him the option to either do the homework/activity with the class or take a movement break. If it's a behavioral issue then he'll hopefully pick the first option, and if it's sensory then he'll benefit most from the second. For a movement break he could do heavy work like carrying books or helping straighten up the room. Wall push-ups or chair push-ups are other good heavy work activities. (Shawn proudly called out that you let the class do wall push-ups sometimes already, so cool!) Another suggestion was to set up a quiet, cozy corner with sensory toys, where he could retreat for a short time while calming down. And I'm sure you do this already, but it's a good reminder for me: it is very important to follow up with Shawn after he calms down to talk about making different choices next time. Shawn’s dad and I should not carry over punishments from school behavior to home, because this causes Shawn too much anxiety, which outweighs the benefit of that kind of punishment-reward system. Next time he gets worried about punishments at home, you may reassure Shawn that we won’t take away anything like his DS. We'll just talk. And finally, the therapist was wondering if the time of day Shawn reacted last Friday is usually a hard time of day for him, or maybe the whole class. If so, then this would be a good time to work in a “brain-gym” movement break for the class around this time, preemptively.
In addition to giving me this advice, the therapist also talked with Shawn and brainstormed ways he could calm down. At home we can squish him in pillows, but we know that's not suitable for a classroom, so we talked about giving ourselves a hug, or squeezing our own hands, or doing wall-pushups.
Here was my response:
Thank you for all the information. Shawn does really well when I have a quick chat with him. I decided to ignore it this time because he was in such a rage. I learned that it was not the best choice on my part. I will make sure I talk with him next time and try to get him to a place of calm. Usually he does a REALLY good job of getting himself back in control. We do a lot of heavy work activities in here and shake breaks. Almost all transitions have one. Shawn knows that he can do wall push-ups or crab walks anytime he needs, but I will remind him. He also likes it when I press straight down on his shoulders. We do something called adventures to fitness most afternoons, which often has heavy lifting exercises in it. I do have a brain gym routine and another book of movements I need to use more. I also have a basket of squeeze items he can use. I think I just need to remind him that it is there when he needs it.
I think part of the problem was how I handled it by trying to ignore the behavior and work with other students. Live and learn, right. ; )
He has been having a great day today. I hope you all had a nice weekend.
